The Footprints of Brave Bear

Am I too Nice?

2012-01-21T09:11:00.001+08:00

It's amazing how certain people who doesn't even meet me up for a drink or chat can suddenly just pop up out of nowhere and ask me for favour. Honestly, the old me would really try to help these people, but the me NOW will try to ignore them. Just recently, some people called me up so that they can try to sell me insurance. Another talked to me in hopes of using my ID to apply for student car pass for university since I am a final year student.

Others messaged me to vote for their campaign, pictures and so on. They will tell me how they need to win the competition and get the cash prize cos they are short on money. These same people owns a car, can afford to travel out of Malaysia and have the most updated gadgets. Are they trying to fuck with me?

Finally Over

2012-01-20T13:20:00.001+08:00

What a bitch! My so-called 'thesis' have been printed out and is ready for submission this afternoon. I would like to thank the faculty admins for doing a hell of a job. I love it when they set 3 different standards for writing to make my life a living hell (standard A from supervisor, standard B from office admin, standard C from coordinator). Also, thank you to Ms H (my project guide) for ignoring my calls and sms during the process of writing. Seriously, the only person I want to thank and say sorry to is dardar for all the trouble that I have caused him.

Anyway, the CNY is almost here and it is time to go back to my home in Kepong. I have not gone back to my home ever since the hospital incident. Reason being that my mom and I are not in talking terms. I was enraged by her constant nagging that I am not as good as my friends. Always telling me to not make her heart sick. Consistent reminder to me that I have to do better in studies (anyone wanna tell me how to get higher than 4.0 GPA?). I am just so fed up with all this nonsense. She always make me feel that I am not good enough. Is it really so difficult to praise me even once? Enough is enough already. I am no longer gonna give a fuck about all this shit.

Tribute to Nono

2011-12-18T11:11:00.001+08:00

Few minutes ago, he breathed his last breath. Just yesterday I still see him running around actively. He was so excited when I gave him food. Back then I always thought when is this old hamster gonna die. He looked so thin and fragile but still so active. Moments before he died, dardar took a look at him and told me that he could no longer hold on anymore. I went to see him. He was breathing very heavily. I caressed him gently. He would normally runaway from me but he stood there curled up and let me touch him. Memories came back to me how I used to try to catch him and he would run and jump and wiggle his way out. The only time he would come close to my hands was when I hand fed him. It's just so sad to see him lying on the sand box motionless. This is the first time I ever shed any tears for a pet. Good bye Nono. I will miss you much...

Shadow in the Skies

2011-12-01T09:30:00.000+08:00

Sunset in Puchong

Life in The Ward

2011-11-17T10:05:00.000+08:00

So i spent 5 days of my life in the ward. Apparently I cocktail of diseases that I had was sign of something worse. The morning on a Sunday, I woke up with some chest pain and difficulty in breathing. I was scared as shit so I told my mom about it. As always, she asks if I wanna go see a doctor. But I just have to spare myself from my mom's full hour lecture of how I never take care of myself (and my mom very panicky and sometimes lack empathy), so I called dardar to come get me to a hospital instead. I had a spontaneous pneumothorax. The doctors estimated that about 90 percent of my left lung was collapsed. What I understand is that my left lung was compressed by air leaked out from my lung. So the doctors punched a hole under the region of my armpit and suck out the air. I was then left in the ward to recover.

The 5 days spent in Selayang Hospital was actually quite eventful. Friends and family came to visit me. Lecturers, coursemates and teachers messaged me to give me support. What meant to me most was dardar being there for me everyday although not all the time since he needs to work. It's not easy for someone to come visit me everyday after work until almost midnight. I love you so much piko-chan.

The hospital staffs are quite nice to me (those working the morning shifts!). And the male nurse and doctors look quite cute too hehehe...

Don't you wish your doctor looks like this~

The last 2 nights there was a total nightmare because there was an old man shouting on top of his lungs for 48 hours without break in some dialect I don't understand. Hardly gotten any sleep those 2 days. Very unfortunately, a man in his 40s with lung cancer opposite my bed died on one night. It was actually one of my hope to see such an event because i wanted to know how things really happen in real life not like in TV. But it's really not a nice feeling because you can feel how the family does not want to give up on the patient when he lost his pulse and heartbeat. Sorrow was in the air as family members cried while doctors could no longer revive the man.

Anyhow, I am now almost fully recovered and can run in no time. Hehehe....

The Cycle

2011-11-05T17:40:00.001+08:00

For the past few months, I have been falling sick, then recover, then sick again, then recover and now sick again. It always starts of with sorethroat, then diarrhea and fever. This time worse, flu and cough have been added to the equation. Aside from my unhealthy lifestyle, the Malaysian weather ought to be blamed. Then couple that with unhygienic food, I end up with a wonderful cocktail of diseases.

Trick (1999)

2011-11-02T19:40:00.001+08:00

Just watched this movie few days ago. Although I personally find the movie having some scenes a bit weird, I like the story line and cute actors. Mark (JP Pitoc) is a Go-go boy and OMG is the word to describe him. Hot smokin body with a killer smile. I also like his ears, they look so monkey-ish. I have a thing for those type of ears, so cute!!! Then we have Gabriel (Christian Campbell) who looks so much like the younger Ryan Reynolds. Gorgeous eyes and abit of a nerdy look. And did I mention that I have a thing for nerdy looking guys as well.

There several scenes in the movie I like so much. The first was when Mark guided Gabriel's hand carressing his body. Then there was the part where they kiss of course. The ending feels really good unlike other typical gay movies where the main actors end with tradegy or full of sex scenes. Enough said... just watch it.

English Classes

2011-09-28T12:20:00.001+08:00

I am currently taking 2 English classes this semester. I really like language classes because the lecturers tend to make the classes more fun and interactive. The 2 young lecturers also tend to make mistakes when giving their lectures. It lightens the mood or atmosphere in the class. I also like their body language as they try to make the classes livelier. They are also very cute looking. I suspect though, that one of them may be gay because he asked everyone in the class if we would talk about gay marriage as the topic for the following week. That is so gay~ Not just because of the topic, but also his overall gestures that sends out vibes of G-ness. Oh~ I so totally like him!

Dream: Big Apple

2011-09-20T21:55:00.003+08:00

Not too sure if you guys are following my updates in facebook, but yesterday I had a funny dream while i was taking a nap in my hostel room. The dream was about me sleeping in my hostel room and I was awakened when my ex-roommate, Meng returned. He was holding a box of Big Apple doughnuts that he made! I don't really know what's the occasion but he asked if i would finish them (I assume he made them for his gf but they couldn't finish them). I wonder I am having some craving for doughnuts or I actually miss my ex-roommate LOL... Perhaps both but this semester will the last semester I will be in UPM. In fact, so far for the past week here I have met plenty of cute guys. Out of the 4 years here, this year is the most! Not just cute locals, but good looking middle eastern guys as well as twinky Thai boys. OMGosh!

Just this morning, there was an adorable nerdy chinese 1st year who came up to me to ask for directions as well as recommendation on where to have meals. He followed me around as I show him the way. He then asked me where I would go next. Too bad I wasn't feeling well or else I would have had brunch with him. Hehehe... The thing is, I was already eye-ing on him since we took the same bus.

UPM Health Center Room 7 Doctor

2011-09-20T15:25:00.001+08:00

So this morning I went to the health center in UPM to get some meds as I have been having diarrhea for the past 3 days as well as a minor nasal and throat irritation that begun last night. I was kinda expecting to get the same doctor that doesn't bother with the checkup or take any body temperature. So I went to the assigned room 7. As usual, the young doc asked of my problem. Then, I was pleasantly surprised when the doctor asked me to lie down on the bed so he could check for any pain. He then took my body temperature despite I told him I don't have fever. Don't get me wrong, that's a good thing because he is doing his duty. I just wish the other doctors there would be a bit more like him. More professional you know? LOL...

This makes me recall a certain incident that happened to a colleague of mine who went to the UPM health center. She was having some abdominal pain and the doctor asked if she was pregnant. And since she wasn't pregnant, the doc concluded that she has infection without taking any urine samples or checking for the location of the pain. Ridiculous I tell you.

But anyway, thank you again to Mr Doc-I-Dont-Know-Your-Name from room 7 for being more responsible in your profession. Maybe UPM students may want to request for the same doctor if you ever need to go there.

Dragon Nest SEA

2011-09-06T11:35:00.001+08:00

Hi guys, forgive my absence. Lately I have indulging myself in online games. Not to the point of addiction though. Ever heard of Dragon Nest? It's a real time dungeon oriented RPG with 4 basic classes to choose (Archer, Sorceress, Cleric and Swordmen). As we progress in the game we get to specify in certain jobs depending on our play style. Currently the SEA version is still on OBT. The game is pretty exciting, but slowly becomes routine because the current level cap is just 24. It takes about 3 days to reach the max level, kinda fast and there are many skills to try out. However, the game lacks abit of exploration. There isn't much need to run around looking (such as solving puzzles or riddles) for things as most of the quest are easy and straight-forward. Items are easy to get and quite cheap as of now. Storage space is lacking and it's really problematic though. Overall the game is good and hopefully they can add more new contents quickly.

To PLU out there playing the game and might wanna join a gay guild (our guild name, PLUpluS). PM or add me, my IGN is Halliwell in Westwood.

For those who wanna try out the game, for more information and download at http://dn.cherrycredits.com/

Full of Crap

2011-08-11T23:11:00.000+08:00

Many people bullshit all the time. But some people gets all the attention they want coz they are good looking and popular among their peers. Whatever shit they post on their facebook always get commented. Bcoz of that, these people tend to update their facebook like~ every 2 to 3 hours. Ever encounter these type of people?

Examples of things they say...

Gals fight, frens tmr..
Guys fight, dunno when cn end..

A leader is a good leader if he/she has good followers...

What the fking bullshit is this?!!! Tons of no-brainers will like their post and say they agree. Are you freaking kidding me?! Let's take the 2nd example, If Najib were given a group of good followers then he is a good leader? What kinda shit ass logic is this? But seriously, our government is actually kinda smart to deliberately educate students to be stupid. In the end it's easier to control a bunch of idiot.

Paranoid Mom

2011-07-18T17:45:00.001+08:00

Friday evening before the rally...

Mom: Boy, where are you?
Bear: Why?
Mom: Just tell me where are you?
Bear: In uni...
Mom: Tomorrow don't go anywhere and don't wear yellow. Just stay at home.
Bear: Why?!
Mom: Tomorrow will have road block and is dangerous to be outside.
Bear: Nothing will happen lah~
Mom: No! Promise me you will stay at home. You don't know what will happen.
Bear: okay okay... =.="

Post-CLEAN Syndrome

2011-07-11T23:45:00.004+08:00

Although I did not join the CLEAN march, I am a sideline supporter. Seeing them on Youtube, I am proud of those who actually did joined the rally. For the past few weeks, certain people in power has repeatedly pound on those who supports for transparency and cleanliness. It's almost repulsive to have to bare with the one-side news reporting being done by those media. Just this morning at the lab, some of the colleagues were watching the rally on the net. One commented that the media is powerful as they only focused on captions of the minority of violent policemen. Also adding that how it was portrayed badly and scares away tourist. Then another commented that they were given a stadium but still insists on having Merdeka stadium. Highlighting that the CLEAN people are trying to stir things up and cause chaos. Having heard their comment, they are obviously under some illusion cast by the governing party.

None of them seem to be bothered by the fact that the daughter of the 4th PM herself and our heroic sasterawan negara supports the walk for CLEAN. Perhaps they are oblivious since not much coverage has been done by the tainted local news. We desperately need a change.

All In a Day's Pleasure

2011-06-29T22:44:00.000+08:00

This is piko-chan writing here. The online game is having a major patch and it's taking like... 11 hours to finish. I'm thinking what to do now. The office mailbox is opened but there isn't any tasks assigned I can do now. I've read all the news online and it's disappointing. This late evening, I'm done reading the last installment of Percy Jackson. It was exciting! And like all young heroes, they like to 'prove' themselves. "I need to kill Voldemort, it's destined", so said Harry Potter and this Percy has the same I-need-to-be-a-hero attitude. But overall, it was a good read.

Dear bought me a book, Twilight. The first installment of the werewolf-girl-vampire saga. Though I've already watched the movie, it's good to read them to know the details. It should keep me occupied for the new few days.

Let's talk about today. It was a cold and wet morning, which I missed it dearly. I wish it will be like that more often. I like it cold. Browsing Facebook postings, one of my friend who is a steward with Cathay Pacific airline, posted his travel pics. Especially Rome. I miss that place and lots of memory over there too. My first backpack for about 3 weeks. Just now, my dear and I were watching Heroes Season 4, a few more episodes to the last one. No matter how powerful one can get, one still need friends and the people around. Same goes to people who thinks the world revolve only to themselves. Just now I read a blogger about the post who was asked which blogger he hate most. I know my dear and I shared the blogger we dislike.

That's all for now, folks.

Updates

2011-06-25T00:35:00.000+08:00

HUH... finally done with lab experiments for my final year project. Next stage will be testing the so-called probionts on the live animals. At the moment, free! My lifestyle has change a little. I don't usually read the news. But due to influence from a particular person, I have been reading news daily. Good change I suppose.

As for my social life, let's just say I don't really have one. Probably because not many people have the same interest as me. I DON'T like window shopping aka walking aimlessly, gatherings more than 4 people, watching movies on the first week of release, talking about girls, concerts, noisy places, smokey area, mamak with bad drinks AND far away.

Perhaps like dardar said, I am an old man trapped in a young body. I like my life simple and less hassle. Life is troublesome as it is, make it simple.

Blistering hands

2011-06-20T03:00:00.000+08:00

Kinda starting to hate lab work. It's sucking the life out of me. And it's getting worse, my hands hurt, skin peeling off due to excessive exertion of force on tight caps. Those damn vials just wouldn't open! I wish I have rough manly skin. Dear say my skin is soft >.<"

Waking up in the month of May

2011-05-27T13:17:00.001+08:00

People at the lab probably thinks I am lazy coz I am not at the lab the whole day. People kept asking me where I am just because they are late to the lab. I am there early. Finishes my work early and of coz I leave early. No point being at the lab when I have nothing else to do right?

On the side note, I know I have been away for a VERY long time. I just didnt have any motivation to continue blogging. Probably I have been spending more time in gaming, lab work as well as watching reality tv show, survivor. Currently watching season season 17, survivor: Gabon and I must say some of those guys are really cute.

Also, my birthday just passed a few days ago. This time around only a few people wished me since I have placed a fake birthdate on my facebook. Really thanks to those few who wished me. Really made my day. Mom brought my sis and I to Daorae, korean restaurant. their BBQ pork and chicken slices are really good. Thier hotpot was okay too, just wished that their prawns were bigger. Dardar on the other hand brought me to Umai-ya, japanese buffet. Food was good especially their unagi. with free flow of tiger beer I think it's very worth the price. Do check it out!

I think that is all from me this time.

Cost Optimization Initiatives

2011-04-19T12:05:00.000+08:00

I'm not sure how many people are sharing my sentiments but things are getting expensive these days. Prices for a lot of stuffs have gone up. And our salary is not on par with the purchasing power we ought to have. This morning, the news have been quite gloomy for the average people on the street. A report by a Swiss bank, indicated that our domestic purchasing power ranking is low, the food prices are going up and there's also another interesting article, with a chart on how much effort we need to pay off our purchases.

Like any company that runs the P&L, Bear and I are also conscious of our spending. With these economic situations, it's always better to spend wisely and have plans for cost optimization initiatives for our monthly budget.

For example, we often go movie outings on a Friday, when there's a 'buy 1 free 1' promotion by Citibank, sharing drinks when eating out. Buy the same food at locations with a lower price, ie hawker stalls, night market instead of bakeries, cafe, etc. Plan out the traveling routes to conserve petrol usage/toll payments, do bulk shopping and take advantage of promotional items. Eat cheaper meat such as chicken instead of pork/fish/beef (I read an article this morning that chicken price is going up, not sure what meat to eat anymore). Buy local fruits instead of imported ones with similar nutritional values. And there's a planned celebration or trip, it's good to plan ahead for the spending hike when it comes.

And the list goes on...

I've once read from a book, 'Poor Dad, Rich Dad', that the first step in financial independence is to eliminate as much debt as possible. With that in mind, I'm trying to be very prudent and giving it a lot of thoughts even when buying air-conditioners, smartphones, new cars etc, when it's always ends up with installments (means more debts).

The question I always ask is, how can we do more with less? When shopping, prioritize the things we need to buy and not the things we want to buy.

Perfect Score

2011-04-13T18:50:00.001+08:00

For once in my uni life I scorred 100% for a test (live feed production). Awesome...

American Idol: Pia Toscano

2011-04-12T21:05:00.000+08:00

Disappointed? Shocked? Not really. Although I didn't imagine her leaving the American Idol so quickly. I thought she would be the last girl to leave the stage. However, she being eliminated is kinda like a now or later thing. She lacks emotions in her singing and she don't have much personality. Unlike the other contestants who are more bubbly or funny. And the thing is, I think American Idol needs someone that could bring something different. Someone who could bring some change to the music industry. Not another Celine Dion or Whitney Houston.

Predictions for top 3, James Durbin, Scotty McCreery and Paul Mcdonald. This is not based on their singing ability, but the way they really know how to connect with the audience.

Distractions

2011-04-05T18:30:00.002+08:00

Life is so full of distractions. TV programmes. Online Games. Facebook. I do notice the amount of time I spend doing these unnessary stuff. But are they really unnessary? Sure enough if we don't engage in them we won't die. There are tons of other stuff we can do to fill up our free time. If I enjoy doing them, that's good enough. But if I can enjoy doing them with loved ones, all the more better.

Another thing I learned (in lectures), recreation brings satisfaction and happiness. Satisfaction and happiness affects the mental and physical well being of a person. If you like what you are doing, do what you like.

Although having that said, I haven't really been spending much of my time with piko-chan. Feel abit bersalah. From time to time, I restrain myself from indulging in too much internet game. But those free time were spent reading blogs (yeah... I still read blogs just that I don't really comment nowadays). I wake up early everyday. Like 7.30 even on weekends? While dardar sleeps til like 11 or 12 =.="

Rest of the day just face computer or eat, shower, sleep. Really need some other activities. The only thing he does is jogging. That to me is ......boring. I prefer swimming, badminton or basketball. He also don't play board games. I may not be good but I like playing chess, chinese chess or something that needs a bit of thinking. My ps2 is collecting dust at his home too since he don't play with me T__T

I really need a change. Now is good, but i have a feeling it can be better.

Natural Behaviour

2011-03-29T19:25:00.002+08:00

Everytime when we argue, I need time. Time regain composure. Time to think of what had actually happen. As well as time to figure out the cause and reasons. I mentioned in my previous post that I like singing, sometimes over the top style with some dance. I also like to act silly or act cute and sometimes I would also imitate celebrities and game or anime characters. I notice that I don't always do it. I only do it in front of people that I like or people that are close to me. Mostly in front of pat and dardar. It became so natural to me that there are times I forgot that my intention was to entertain them, to make them laugh or smile.

Of course I enjoy doing it because it makes me happy. But at the same time, I hope that the people that I do it for also be happy with me. When they don't, it upsets me. Really, not all the time but occasionally. Dardar mentioned that sometimes he is afraid that I overwork myself. But as I said, it became so natural to me doing silly stuff that I forgot why I did it in the 1st place. But when dardar said that he loves seeing me being energetic and lively because it makes him happy too.

It was also the first time seeing him in tears. Like really in tears for awhile with the sobbing. hehe... so nice. Sometimes I wish he would be more in touch with that part of him. To cry out when he is feeling sad or unhappy. To smile and laugh out loud when in joy. He is so cancerian, always putting up that thick shell to mask his weakness and emotions.

First Ever Promoter

2011-03-28T00:39:00.001+08:00

My 1st time being a promoter. Was at Solaris Mont Kiara Cold Storage. Easy work and kinda fun coz quite a few eye candy. Other than that, I am exhausted coz woke up at 6 this morning to go Cheng Ming then straight to work. Stand walk stand walk whole day... TIRED! SLEEP!

Phase of Uncertainty

2011-03-23T20:00:00.004+08:00

I recall a friend once said, "They do not understand because they do not go through what we do". They in this context are people that do not go through a phase in life where they doubt about their sexuality, in short, people that are homophobes. Not only PLU go through this phase, some straight people too.

From young remember how every single drama and movie I watch is always about guy kissing girl and happily ever after. I do find it sweet and romantic. I used to imagine myself marrying a women having lots of kids.

However, at the same time I am also attracted to guys. I remember staying up late to watch Survivor. I would sit in front of the screen admiring the good looks and body. As for the ladies, I could hardly remember their names. Even until now, I find it hard to memorize names of girls that I meet.

Sure enough later I find myself liking ~~dicks~~ guys more than girls when I was with my very 1st ex. But after we went separately, I find myself in a phase of uncertainty. Despite knowing that I like guys, I tried to go 'straight'. I tried really hard to make myself interested in a girl. Pretending that I want to know her. It was torturous. I question myself if I were gay, bi or a confused straight over and over again.

I had no one to talk to. I wasn't participating in any blog or PLU support group. I was by myself, surrounded by homophobic people. Feeling that I am an outcast. Abnormal. Worse, I am new in uni with coursemates that are either racist or not-so-into-non-mandarin-speaking chinese.

Then came Jesus. I thought I could make it to the other side if I believed in him. At one point I really thought by accepting him I am saved. That I won't be thrown into the fiery pits of hell. The Christians offered me help on turning straight. Then came the doubt again. For all my life I had lived without HIM. Why would I trust my life in him?

That was the moment when I found PLU blogosphere. I read day and night. Knowing that I am not the only one going through all this puts me at ease. I used to think that being 'different' in Malaysia means you are as good as gone. The blogs shown me that there are many of us out there. Living all sorts of different lives whether they like it or not.

From the point I accepted being who I am, was also the end point of the phase of uncertainty. Being colourful is definitely special. Many dull 'normal' people won't like special people. It's hard being special as we are. But as I could recall, when I was a kid, I always wanted to be special. However, as I grow up, I just wanna be the same like others just so I can fit in. It shows how others can affect us, the way we think.

I owe my freedom to those 'colourful' blogs.

The Nipple Song

2011-03-21T23:08:00.000+08:00

I learned of this song (again) from my online games guild team members. Made me laugh like a mad man.

The Headache that Fired Up the Thoughts

2011-03-20T18:09:00.000+08:00

The headache since the early afternoon. The throbbing pain on the right side of the head, the stabbing pain on my right eye, the hard stressed muscle on the right side of my neck, the hardening pain on my right shoulder. I lie on bed next to my Bear reading The Lovely Bones. The house later went quiet. I stand by the window looking at the falling rain drops. I sat at the sofa, blinded by the cloudy sky. I continued reading but only words. I retreated myself to an empty room. No one ever goes in there except to do my ironing.

I sat crossed leg closed my eyes. Facing the window. The eerie silence of the room. Occasional sound of birds chirping, noise of neighbors dragging their chairs upstairs and cars passing by the idle room. I closed my eyes and not caring anything. Trying. I took a deep breath and reminded myself to regular breath deeply. The pain came and went. As I felt into stupor, the pain subsided.

Funny how sitting down alone, not caring anything in the world, allows all sort of thoughts running through the mind. Fear pierced through me. Why am I fearful. Why am I so conforming. Why am I excited with the attention. My mind was talking to myself with questions. Replies of I dunno.

Treat People with Civility and Respect

2011-03-16T13:00:00.005+08:00

It's a common situation when your cell phone rings with an unidentified number asking you to purchase insurance, enroll for new credit cards, apply for low-interest loans or even a 'wrong number' call. Or, as you were having a meal, you might be approached by people seeking donations, sell products or etc. Or, you might be dealing with customer service, retail assistants or any other counter service of a company.

If I'm being approached for donations/products/services which I'm not interested in, I usually give them a smile and shake my head declining my interest, or maybe take a short peek at the brochure to see if i'm interest and then continued with a smile and reply with a no thank you. If they are persistent, I would have the same persistence to reply with a no thank you.

As I read in the media/experience so far, I just do not understand why some people may be reacting rudely to these scenario. Either they are being treated invisibly or being scolded or being cursed. No doubt our space/time is invaded but I believe these people are just doing their job. And let them do their job.

Talking about people who are doing their job, I once read an experience on how a resident was fumming mad because the guard didn't allow the resident to enter the condo and the resident didn't have the entry pass in hand. The guard was just doing his job not to allow non-resident pass holders to trepass the premise and residents also have the responsibility to their roles. What if a robber used the same tactics and the guard let him too?

It's funny how everyone wants things to suit their own convenience; and when things go wrong, people start blaming everyone else for not doing their job.

Back to treating people with civility, my Bear pointed it right when he said everyone is a hypocrite. When our client/boss responded us rudely over the phone or on the face, we bitched about till the cows come home. But as we ourselves, as a client, begins to decline in civility and started behaving rudely to others, we are of no difference.

It's again when we are always so self-absorbed or self-centered that all things in the whole world should/must revolve to fit ourselves. It's alright to purse what is right as a customer but do it in a civil manner.

Some of us claimed how great we are but ain't behaving as one. Have respect for other people if wants to be respected in return.

Ripple Effect

2011-03-14T18:53:00.003+08:00

Some of you may have read the blog description below the title of my blog - "Every step leaves ripples for the earth keeps all records". I wrote that when I first started blogging. Whether it is grammatically correct or not I shall leave it as it is. But what I wanna tell is that no matter what we do, consciously or sub-consciously it always leave a ripple effect. In the ripple, your action is that center where it starts the ripple. It then expands and touches others. By others, I mean other people.

An example, my mother used to think that the 3R campaign is a waste or time. Only people without a life would be bothered about it. At that time I thought it was troublesome, the teachers wants every student to send in recyclable materials to the school. I started doing it and told my mom what to be kept. I will not lie, she was not keen about it at first because she thinks it's keeping rubbish. After about a year doing it at home, she got so excited about doing it because other parents are also involved and she don't want to lose out. Same goes for the usage of plastic bags.

As of late, I have been watching lots of YouTube videos. I somehow got caught up again with the way Americans speak. Their intonation and the way they express their feeling is what I view as interesting. And they make those cute little faces when they make their vlog. I try to incorporate that into my life cause I think it adds flavor to life. You may say that I am easily influenced by others but what the heck. Life is about changes. I love changes. Changes are fun.

The Tolerating Tolerance

2011-03-14T09:51:00.002+08:00

Last few days ago, I bumped into a video of this Asian American guy who talks in a fast paced, ghetto style that talks about his life experience. With his diva, high-pitched and bitchy hand movement style, if was a good laugh to watch it. Soon, my Bear was eagerly wanted to watch it too. He enjoyed it and even found out that that American guy even has a video blog. It has now become one of his regular entertainment watching that video streaming.

I found it a good laugh alright, well..., on the first occasion of watching it. As my dear Bear find it amusing and good entertainment, it was becoming more of an irritation to me, that diva, ghetto, high pitch, non-stop ranting (i know, how much i emphasized this...) interspersed regularly with the F-word. I'm a firm believer of individual rights and so... I don't barge into the room and tell Bear that it is so annoying and to stop watching it. Nor, I'm stopping people or condeming them for doing things they like which I dislike. If my Bear finds it amuzing and have a good life for himself, I'm fine with that.

Now, how do I deal with myself when my mind is bubbling with annoyance when that guy's voice is vibrating in the house through that PC speaker? Actually there are a few things to do/have done to isolate myself. Use my handphone earphone to listen to Light&Easy radio channel or listen to the mp3 player (it's time I find my birthday present portable mp3 player from William/Cheryl to be useful), sit at the sofa in front of the tv watching the public channel with the equal volume or keep myself lying down on bed reading a book with the door closed.

At the end of the day, when my Bear shares his funny moments which he found entertaining in that guy's and his comrades video blogs, I'm still glad to know he had a good time.

That somehow summarized on the scenario when your spouse/lover doing something he/she likes, you dislike and going through with it.

Asexuals

2011-03-08T20:10:00.004+08:00

It's weird how people can assume things to follow a certain pattern. What would you think if you discovered a bottle of lubricant or a packet of condoms in a persons belongings? What more when you know that guy has a boyfriend. Sex would be what most of us think of. Penetration to be precise. I find these people really cute. It's not wrong to make assumptions, but it may not always be what you pressumed. Not all gays are into anal sex. Some people enjoy masturbating with lubs and/or rubbers. It is a fact.

Ever heard of the term asexuals in the world of gay? I didn't really know about it until last December when dardar and I read about it from a brochure from PT Foundation. Apparently, people that are asexuals are people that do not have sex with others. They prefer playing themselves or doing some sexual activities together that does not involve penetration. I think I may be one lol... I wonder if dardar is too... hehehe!

The Generation Gap

2011-03-03T22:30:00.002+08:00

While having lunch with Pat, he asked me what is it like to be with someone who is alot older. Piko-chan is indeed a decade plus older than me, but I don't find us very much different. Or perhaps I don't really think about our differences. Our similar interest is what binds us. We both enjoy playing online games together. We enjoy cruising together. I like whites. He likes jap and chinese. But throughout our time together, I have developed some interest in the others too. I still dun like jap porn though. SUX big time!

We both like to eat. I like to critic what I eat but piko-chan never talks much about the taste. He wallops almost anything. I LOVE mangoes. My eyes blings whenever I see mango. While piko-chan loves bananas. Heck! I bet most of my readers love 'bananas' too. HaHaHa...

He likes sleeping longer hours on weekends coz he don't need to work while I prefer waking up early to engage in games that stimulate the mind. He likes reading. I read 3 books from his shelves and I think it was one of the most extraodinary thing anyone can see me doing. Reading books is BORING!

Piko-chan is a person that search for info (wikipedia, etc.) about a movie before we watch it. I just watch anything that I feel is good enough from the poster or trailer. Piko-chan doesn't want to watch horror movies coz he is scaredy-cat. I watch horrors eventhough I am more afraid than him.

In the end, gap or not doesn't really matter. What matters to me is staying happy together. I do my part to paint a smile on him coz seeing him smile makes me smile.

Sekinchan Ikan Bakar, Puchong

2011-03-01T13:38:00.002+08:00

There was a new shop in the neighbourhood, comparatively new, and every time we passed through that place, the shop is brimmed with people. On Valentine's Day, we spent the dinner there. Although it was just around 6.30pm, that place was almost half full. I didn't know people are craving a lot for grilled fish! We ordered a stingray fish, a mug of ~~clamps~~ clams, rice and drinks. There were notices that we need to be patient as it needs time to grill the fish and all. And I was already hungry! Finally the dishes came. I found it quite normal but Bear like the paste that comes with it.

With all the people coming in and hunting for tables, it wasn't a good place to talk about romantic stuffs. The approach is to eat, pay, leave and find another place for other things to carry on. I didn't check the receipt but Bear calculated that we only paid very little for the fish. From the price of per kg, and the amount charged on the fish, it looks like we ate less than 50g of fish meat. I wonder if the cash register is fixed by now.

I Love You

2011-02-28T19:55:00.000+08:00

25th of February. Last friday at 8.25pm was the time I received a message from my mum. I was at Alamanda Putrajaya after watching Sanctum. I thought she was gonna ask me if I wanna go back home this weekend. Apparently not. It was an MMS written "I Love You". She had never said those words. Never wrote them. For a moment I was speechless. I never felt happier in my life. I had a feeling of belonging. An urge to go home and spend time with her. I know she is happy when I am home. Having me to talk to. I just wish I have the same courage to say those words to you. Mum, I Love You.

Sanctum

2011-02-26T18:52:00.000+08:00

Went watch it with piko-chan last night. I think it was awesome. Lets see... First off, I like the characters. Josh in the movie is so lengzai. huhuhu! Then the story, trapped in a deep cave with a storm hitting. We can see the different sides of human when they are faced with life and death situation. Making tough decisions. Survival skills. Ego and principles. Trust. An unspoken love of a father.

On another note, my FYP presentation went well. Received some good comments. My supervisor was also satisfied with my performance. The night before I couldn't sleep at all. Rehearse few times before sleep. But keep dreaming of presentation stuff and waking up. Anyhow, still have to act energetic on that day. Damn relaxed after the presentation though. Yippie!!!

Reconnecting

2011-02-24T20:40:00.001+08:00

Friends come and go. At least that was when I was still studying. There is one particular guy that first taught me how to play digimon on ps1. I would go over to his home and play together. Sometimes he would come to mine. We were about 11 years old back then. It all started with games only. Then, I slowly developed interest in him. I was curious to check out his weener back then. I would try to spy on him when he goes to the toilet. Didn't manage to see it, but I did manage to grab it once! That was when I won him in the digimon battle. hehehe...

Last time before I go to bed, I would be thinking of him. Think of how nice the next day would be if I get to meet him again. At that time I really felt that he was lengzai. No other sexual thoughts though. I didn't even know what was frenching until form 3. But one thing is confirmed, I was interested in 'bananas' only even at that stage.

I have forgotten that he was actually the first guy that I started showing signs of attraction towards the same gender until we recently reconnected each other on FB. Memories... Besides him, I have got 2 other friends on my FB list that I lost contact after we left primary school and only recently found each other. All thanks to FB ^__^

Singing Heart

2011-02-23T10:54:00.000+08:00

Totally inspired by tuls, the walking Ipod. I have always like to sing. Just that I didn't realize it til someone blogged about it. It all began humming when I was in primary school. Then started singing and memorizing lyrics thanks to Westlife (Shane is awesome cute!). I only sing to myself back then. Scared will kena critic. Then as I go secondary, life become music-less. Too caught up with all activities that I didn't give a shit about singing anymore. However, the melodies came back to me when Guang Liang was out with his song Tong Hua. This time, I sang to me sisters. They would also sing along and we would criticize each other. As time goes by, I began singing to dardar. We would sing together in the car, bathroom, elevator, staircase. But dardar will try to shut me up when I sing on the streets. He dun like too much attention >.<".

Beyonce, Mariah, Westlife, Guang Liang, Avril, Maroon 5 just to name a few of my fav. I like the older songs though. Somehow I am not really up-to-date with the songs. Just sing those that like.

Premonition

2011-02-19T00:09:00.001+08:00

I get some weird dreams sometimes. Those short flashes of certain scene that doesn't really make any sense. Puzzled, confused, I would normally forget about them. But those instances would resurface at moments I least expect. There will be a sense of familiarity. As if I was re-living the moment. Twice this morning. I think my powers are getting stronger.

Can you see the future? LOL!

Phoebe from Charmed

I'm Back!

2011-02-16T00:01:00.001+08:00

Yes, as a guest author of this blog. Since I do not have much time maintain one of my own, I'm using it here to express my opinions, eating out, trips and things like that. Hopefully I'm able to write some thing nice here. Thanks for all the support to Bear and hope with my contribution here, there will be more supports coming in. Have a nice Wednesday and days ahead for the week.

By the way, remember to read out the author label below. Since there's no other visual distinction to differentiate author, the posted by will tell you who wrote what.

My Current Stand

2011-02-11T12:58:00.001+08:00

In response to a comment by anonymous, "well, it juz like, she might want u to get married and have a bunch of grandson/daughter for her...from ur blog i think u d only boy isnt it? so isnt juz u should carry ur family name to ur next generation...well, that's my opinion..sorry, no offence"

No offense taken.

My mum told me that she wants to travel around the world and not be my kids babysitter. Not that I do not want kids. I don't mind having adopted kids. Plus, when Hins Cheung came out, my mum still adored him and said that whoever he loves is his personal business.

As for my family name, I don't think I have any obligations towards it. I am not into all the traditional stuff like passing on my name or whatever.

Honestly, if u are in pain because u are doing something unwillingly (such as studying medicine when your interest is fashion) do u not think that ur mom would feel the pain too. I think most parents just want to see their kids happy. My mom used to say that I should be a doctor or lawyer like most chinese parents would want. I said no because I have no interest at all. Rather than walking down a road unwillingly, I always believe that we should try to talk things out. I also believe in flexibility and freedom of choice as long as no harm onto others are done.

Top 5 Red Packet

2011-02-08T15:00:00.000+08:00

This year I have picked out 5 of my favourite red packet design from those that I have received. I don't normally care about the designs because all I want is the $$ in it. LOL...

From the left we have Jusco AEON, followed by Standard Chartered, Yakult, Yeo's and Juice Works. The Best overall design goes to Jusco. The rosy red background, cute rabbit and gold writing wins. The quality of the paper also doesn't look cheapo. 2nd placing goes to the simple yet classy Standard Chartered. The picture taken spoils it but in real looks better. The other 3 are just to fill up the other placings coz top 5 sounds better than top 2... hahaha... Oh, but the Juice Works red packet has a 20% discount voucher on their tumbler products. Worth checking it out if you're planning to get 1.

One of the red packet above contains money. Wanna guess which one? No prizes though... LOL...

My Favourite Dog

2011-02-07T20:48:00.000+08:00

I like golden retriever but they get a little too big. I am totally terrified of big dogs T__T

The best is still mini schnauzer. They are extremely adorable. They are so moustachie that they look grandpa-ish. They look so fun to play with. But I can almost never get one. My attention span towards pets wouldn't even last 2 weeks. LOL

What Do Y'all Think?

2011-02-06T11:07:00.004+08:00

I know it's Chinese New Year. It's all jolly nice and happy. Everyone is thinking of fun and food but mostly the latter I supposed. Yesterday, my friends came over to my home to "bai nian". A certain friend of mine did not make it and hence my mum ask why he wasn't here. Apparently, his father got cancer. Here is the situation, would you guys still visit him at his home or just leave them alone? Some of my friends think that we shouldn't be disturbing them. But in my opinion I think he needs our support. I tried calling him but he didn't answer the phone. I don't know if he was trying to avoid my calls but I really wish that he and his family are able stay positive.

And Happy New Year to all. May all that is reading this will have good health and a happy new year.

Hypocrite

2011-01-30T16:16:00.000+08:00

I have said it many times. I am a hypocrite and so are you. It's the ugly truth but not many of us realize it. Few days ago, I played a prank on one of my coursemate. She was unhappy with it. One of her friend came to me and said I was evil. The fact is, they have did the same to me last time. What I did wasn't revenge. But perhaps a reminder that we are indeed similar beings.

The next issue is "Mengumpat". It's a malay word that means talk bad about someone else. I almost always talk to Pat in cantonese. Malay colleagues around me would say "mengumpat saya ke?" which means are u talking bad about me? They would go on to say that it is "berdosa" or sinful to talk bad about others. Honestly, whenever we speak in cantonese they assume that we talk bad about them. But if they had never done wrong, why would they worry of others were talking bad about them? I am sure some of you have got certain languages that u are more comfortable to speak as they remain the faster media to convey/receive the message. I have never had any suspicions about them when they spoke in their Kelantan/Terengganu village slang. How fair is that?

Then again, I had a coursemate that told me what they did was wrong too. She too is a muslim and she told me it is also bad to "buruk sangka" which means to have negative suspicions about others. Whatever it is, I know we are all hypocrites. The END~

UPM Version

2011-01-27T20:55:00.000+08:00

Cute guys appear almost everyday in campus. There are 2 in particular that are worth mentioning. Edison Chen look-alike and Yoga Lin look-alike. However, the UPM version of Yoga is darker-skinned and he is a Malay =.="

Biting More Than I Can Chew

2011-01-26T15:20:00.000+08:00

She said that I will manage it. My supervisor I mean. But seriously, there is so much i do not know about the title given. As some of you might know, I study mainly about fish and perhaps some prawns. Microbs are perhaps the last thing I would want to study. But guess what... my supervisor's field of study is microbiology. Arggghhhh... my final year project will be on probiotics for a certain marine fish. And the fish isn't cheap. It's such a headache. I am totally clueless about bacteria culture. Don't even know how to prepare the culture medium. What more about bacterial challenge and what-so-ever. So much reading to do. So much work to handle. So much more to learn...

Then again there are master students there to guide us. They should be very useful since they are from biotech bacground. Hopefully...

New Year's Resolution

2011-01-11T10:58:00.001+08:00

What is with this new year's resolution? I didn't even know that such thing existed until somewhere last year. It was through blogging that I discovered people actually have new year's resolution (NYR). And so, what is my very first NYR? Let's see... I have thought hard about ( for about 2 minutes)... My NYR would be to have none at all. I don't really have a specific target that I wanna achieve. All this while, I just wanna be an extraordinary person living a simple and happy life. Weird? Deal with it.

Let's see here, piko-chan said last year his NYR was to achieve six-pack abs that I could scrub my laundry with. But in the end, he ended up working out less than his usual routine =.="

Other bloggers that I ~~am lazy to name~~ don't feel like naming have a long list of NYR. I totally blame my lack of 'desire to plan' on the chapter of disadvantages of planning that I read last year for my finals. I am not joking, that small tiny chapter exist in the notes and was one of the questions that was asked in the finals. Conclusion is I don't have NYR ^__^

The Cycle Begins Again

2011-01-10T11:00:00.000+08:00

Am I a celebrity or what? People come up to me and ask me about my results and before I could answer them, they assumed that I got 4.0 again. It's like history is repeating itself. However, some things have changed. First week of the sem and I have no reports or what-so-ever to do. Cool huh! (YES, it is cool coz I always have assignments and reports on the first week of lecture). In fact, many of my lecturers aren't even in uni now. The best thing is, they are my fav lecturers! No sweat this sem. YAY!

Then, I bumped into one of my sarawakian friend. He is getting cuter btw. urm urm... I get so excited everytime I bump into him. *giggles*.

The library took a change too, I can no longer play any facebook applications. It is definitely a good thing. The library is so empty now, I can use the comps here whole day. The weather on the other hand has been kind. It's cloudy today and it makes me feel lazy. So lazy I could just doze off. The only thing that keeps me awake would probably be the cute guys that are occasionally appearing out of no where.

Last but not least, chinese new year is around the corner. Spring cleaning and shopping season is here again. ugh... The yearly chore is back. I don't feel lke going home. So troublesome...

First Post of 2011

2011-01-01T00:59:00.000+08:00

2011 is here. A new year and a new sem is starting for me. I will be starting my final year project soon. So troublesome but it has to be done.

New years and Christmas celebration has been peaceful for me. I don't like the crowd anyway. A simple and satisfying dinner with piko-chan.

Oh, I did an experiment that started 1month ago. I changed my burst date to 31st of December on facebook. Funny thing is, people that celebrated my burstday with me in 2009 also wished me. My burstday is on the lovely month of May. Nearly a hundred wished me and only 6 person knew it wasn't my burstday. I am totally not shocked by the number because I wanted to see how many people would actually wish me twice a year. It was also to test how many people fully rely on facebook to keep track of things. For me, I personally prefer my handphone to register burstdays. Maybe I am outdated but I think my handphone is much trustier. I know a few of my friends also register fake birthdays for their own reasons.

J: The Romantic Bastard

2010-12-23T08:30:00.001+08:00

I have been missing for a few days. Reason is that I had trip to Ipoh for the very first time. All thanks to request from J. We were there to act as extras for a local tv series, Rantau Harimau. The setting was taken in a waterfall area in Tapah. The place is pretty cool, flowing river, hot spring and lots of butterflies to watch. If lucky there may even be fireflies at night. I didn't get the chance to explore Ipoh cause I wasn't there for a vacation. But the nice part of the whole acting thing is that I got to meet lots of different people. Some were 1st timers like me, some were seasoned actors, soldiers as well as some part timers. They also look gorgeous! Imagine hunky Malay soldiers walking topless in the scenes and cute chinese Ipoh twinks all over the sets. hohoho...

That aside, I was actually quite frustrated with J. Not because he gave all his attention to pleasing his gf but because of the constant teasing. I was being made the teasing subject almost all the time and I don't like it. I admit I am a little short temper and I blame it on not just myself, but also the exhaustion, insect bites and lack of sleep. And when I am pissed off, it totally shows on my face. I never understood why I always try to help this bastard whenever he asks for help. It was when he showed his concern, I realized that he wasn't just any other friend that I have. He is more. I never wanted to admit it but he is my best friend along with pat, WH and a few others.

They are the people that I can talk to about anything. They won't give me the weird stare or too much info thingy. The whole trip made me realized that I still have a life with my buddies. One of the funniest thing was when he said our friendship until was based on his persistence. True, he never gave up on it. When he told me he remembers how he consistently asked my name and I just ignored him, if he gave up then we would never have been friends till now. It made me chuckle. I teared. I didn't know he would recall. He apologized and asked why I was unhappy.

When he said he didn't want to lose his best friend just because he wanted to make others laugh, I lost my words. Things he said that night was what I longed to hear. For me to confirm that I wasn't just a tool or nobody in his life. Damn it, I had the biggest cheek shower this year that night. I know a female best friend of a queer would be a fag hag but what about guys that are best friends of a gay dude? Dardar pointed out that it's abnormal to have ex to be best friends, is it?

Slippery Anniversary + Yen Shabu Shabu

2010-12-18T22:00:00.000+08:00

Shoe size 43. What a slippery experience. My first time ice-skating. OMG. I fell a few times. So damn embarrassing. Dardar legs were hurting so he didn't skate. Took me about 20minutes to get rid of the fear of falling. Quite similar to swimming, just need to eliminate the fear of drowning and voila! I managed to skate slowly without support rounding and rounding the ring (so proud of myself LOL)! I have been to Sunway Pyramid a few times and I always notice cuties or lengzai skating there. The thing is, they are not just there for looks. They can really skate. They glide here and there, so pro... a couple times they just chill in front of me XD... So wasted, there was once I fell and got one cute guy wanna help me get up but I was too shy so I got up on my own. Haiz... should have taken the opportunity. hehehe... anniversary

Then we had our dinner @ Yen Shabu Shabu in Menjalara. Their pork slice and mutton slice were really good. They have free flow of drinks(my fav iced lemon tea) and not so common ice-cream selection (tiramisu, durian, grape). Their sauce are good too, especially the chicken rice chili sauce, tomyam sauce and sweet sour chili sauce. On mondays to thursdays they have special dish called Sha-Tien gai. A must try if you are there on any of those days. Their pumpkin puff side dish is also worth trying!

Unfading Love

2010-12-15T00:00:00.001+08:00

I was with J a couple of days ago and he hit me with a question. He asked me if my love for dardar was fading away. What he meant was that if our love have turned into a norm. Something that we do daily and no longer have the passion and infatuation we first started. The odd thing is, it took me some time to actually fall in love with him. Yes, it was not love at first sight. We were together and I wasn't in love with him from the start. Through the ups and down of our time together, I developed feelings for him. It struck me that I am in love with him when things went downhill and he suggested that we breakup. I guess there are times when I do take things for granted. That night I cried for quite some time. Hundreds of questions ran through my mind. It was only then I started to question if my feelings were real. I recall the things I have wanted to do with him but it all seems too late. From that moment on, I knew that my love for him is real. I am in love with him and I love him. And to answer J, I love him more and more everyday. I remember that I once told dardar, love is like a seed. We don't just plant it, we need to feed it with water and nutrients. It grows from care and commitment. Blossoming into a year old, it is only now that I truly understand what I once told him.

Home Alone

2010-12-09T15:28:00.000+08:00

I am sooo bored. The Atlantica server is down for maintenance and honestly, that's the only thing I have been doing at home for as long as I can recall. Occasionally I workout when I feel motivated. Well, usually after admiring hunky dudes like this one~

Or this one~

Then when I get real horny is time for some ~~p0rn~~ artsy movie and some activity that I think many guys are familiar with. lol... So, what do you do home alone on a holiday?

Why Do We Come Out?

2010-12-05T10:15:00.000+08:00

The thing with coming out whether to friends or family, is to me a very important stage in a gay men life. I am quite sure many of us always think about having a life where we need not hide. Some say that our sexuality should be kept only to ourselves. Why do we want to tell others about it? There are always reasons to it. First, lets talk about coming out to friends. For me, I came out to my friends because I wanted people to know who I really was. There is this loneliness that lurks within me because I felt that I was different. Not being able to tell others made it worse. I feared that if I were to let anyone know I would get beaten up. The society would make me an outcast. I was also afraid that if the secrets burst out, my friends would leave me. Then again, I was already lonely in the beginning. Just imagine, have you guys been in a situation where your friends tell you that they know you better than yourself, they didn't know you were gay and they trash talk about gay stuff like they understand us? There is always a trigger that prompts us to do what we do. With all the worries I have, why do I still want to out myself? Simple, I just wanted to feel good about who I really am. Think about it, many people always try to do things to make themselves more special. They want to be someone different from others. For people like us, we are already different. We are already special but many of us just wished that we would be same like the others so that we can fit in the society like how others wants us to be. Note this, as human, we want things that we do not have.

Then comes family, these are the people that we care most. Personally, I find coming out to family is a lot harder. Some might beg to differ? I am quite sure some of you have heard of stories like how a guy came out to his parents and his parents called the police, brought him to a psychiatrist, cut his allowances and so on. Why do I still come out? For me, my family are the ones that I am closest to, the ones that will be with me in times of need. We give support to one another. Home is where I feel most comfortable. A safe haven where I can be who I am in my most craziest form without putting on my mask of fake-ness. Some say that mothers know about their son. True for me, sometimes she just couldn't accept it because of any factor such as upbringing, education, traditional mindset and so on but one thing is for sure, she still loves me and care for me. Same goes with my sis, we may argue, quarrel, hit each other, but when it comes to family, we still care for one another. My sister always knew I am different. We would watch television together and comment on the cute guys. LOL! It is just so much fun to be plu having sisters that understands us. hehehe...

Hairy Potter

2010-12-02T11:56:00.000+08:00

I am not a fan of Hairy Potter. Really. I don't read the books, but I like the whole idea of magic and weird creatures in the movie. I have been watching all the episodes but this is the first time I went to watch it on the big screen. Thanks to dardar of course lol. Honestly, I like the first movie best, the sorcerer's stone. But the ones later are just mediocre. Half blood prince was the worst for me. Totally boring since I don't understand a thing they say. Total failure for that one. But the latest installment was surprisingly better in the sense that I was not bored by it. I also liked the part where they describe the deathly hollows using those animation. By ranking, the latest movie would be 3rd in my list after sorcerer's stone and chamber of secrets. The movie was quite good except I prefer Potter to be fully clothed. He is just so Hairy Potter you know? As for reading the books, I will wait till the last episode of the movie.

Note: I HATE people that reads the book and talks how bad the movie is because they cut it short but they still watch every episode of the movie on the first day screening.

Sepet

2010-11-28T23:52:00.001+08:00

A Malaysian made movie by Yasmin Ahmad. A love story of a Malay girl and a Chinese boy. 1 word could describe it, Good! I think everyone should watch it if they can. This movie was released few years ago though. You guys will probably have to download it somewhere. This movie is one of the few local movies that I actually like. The actor, Ng Choo Seong (Jason) and actress, Sharifah Amani (Orked) are so adorable. When I say they are cute they are REALLY cute! The sepet-ness of Jason just kills me. I would never put myself in his shoes though *crossed fingers*. I still love my roasted pork and char siew. The movie also depicts the real attitude of many Malaysian as well as issues that has been ongoing for years in our country. Quite bold I would say. Aside from that, the little mistakes that was not filtered out made this movie more realistic. Don't you feel weird when every sentence is perfectly uttered?

An Unforgettable Night

2010-11-24T14:45:00.001+08:00

I still remember the night I was at a friends house. It was at the dining table. 4 guys chatting away. Games. Siblings. Books. Topics that are of common interest. Things were going fine until one of them started talking about homosexuals. I was kinda speechless when they suddenly talk about it. They talked about how they hated gays. They even said that if they were ever to know if any of their friends are gay they would never befriend them any longer. I was still in the closet at that time. I wanted to just say out loud that I am gay. But I was scared. Afraid that I would end up alone. Sitting there hearing them trash talk of how gays play ass. Saying how they were disgusted. Saying how the gays always dress up with exp clothes because they are rich. Those were my friends. I was devastated by what they had said. That night, it propelled me to take a step out of the closet. I started reading more blogs. Talk to more people. Slowly opening to friends. I realized that if they couldn't accept me then it's too bad. Having that said, I have them to thank for because if it was not for them I might still be in the pitiful closet.

You Again Movie Review

2010-11-18T15:25:00.001+08:00

Adorable James Wolk & Odette Yustman

The movie depicts how school life is for some of us. It also tells of how the experiences makes us to be who we are today. Everyone goes true different stuff in their life. Some being the bullies and some being the ones that always get picked on. Some always shine in the spotlight while others just being the background. You know how some people always tend to be the ones in the middle of the picture. The famous one that everyone wants to stand with. I am never that person. Always being by the side of pictures is me. But things took a change when I entered uni. People notice me. As much as I dislike my coursemates, they aren't that bad. I reevaluated my friends from high school and sad to say, I find some of them too fake. Some of them say they care about me when they actually never even get to know me. Some old friends suddenly turned cold for whatever reason they have.

Sean Wing is so CUTE!!!

In the movie, Kristen Bell had a shock of her life when she discovers that her arch nemesis was going to marry his brother, James Wolk. Dwelling in her miserable past, she did everything possible to prevent Odette Yustman (The Bully) from marrying her brother. But of course in the end she forgives her for what was already in the past. This is what I like about the movie, it tells us that no matter what wrong doings a person might have did to us in the past we should always give them a second chance. People can change. Carrying a bag of hatred can be really tiring. Taking revenge might backfire and makes things worse.

Jamie Lee Curtis & Sigourney Weaver (also rivals in the movie)

If you are looking for some movie to just laugh it all out, this is a good one. The 2 guys are really cute too. Hehehe...

Horny Old Dog

2010-11-14T07:39:00.000+08:00

You know how we always get friend request in facebook. With the amount of gay people on our friend list they somehow get to us and wants to add us on FB. There was one particular old man that I add back when I just joined FB. He first appear to be nice and friendly. Talking to me as if he was parenting me. I played along. When he said he could be a nice daddy to me I just replied with a smile. I honestly thought he was just being nice. Up until few days ago we chatted again. As usual the greetings and concerns. Then we touched on the topic of sex and anal. He kept telling me that I have to try anal. As if trying to force it onto me. Somehow I think he wants to fuck me. I had it with him and told him I wanna go shower. With nerves of steel, the horny dog asked if I could show him my dick. Mind me, he is a married man in his middle age with kids. And he even knows that I already have a bf. Repulsive. Without hesitation I deleted him from FB and blocked him msn.

Connecting Heart

2010-11-09T08:25:00.002+08:00

I know of how ugly my temperaments can get. I am not always sunny, coz even the weather have to rain sometimes. Distractions keep me from being logically at times. Too many things going on makes me forget about taking care of your feelings. And they say to err is human. Last night was another heart to heart talk. I know we grow to know each other better. It's true when I say that I look at you before going to bed every night because I want to remind myself how fortunate I have been to have you by my side. I am well aware that you always try your best to fulfill my wishes. Demanding I can be but you always try to be there for me whenever you can. I realize when I say that I am much of a attention seeker. I can't sit still. That is just part of me. Always trying to do something weird or out of place even if when we are busy with our work. For me, it is just a way to relieve stress. And I know that you know.

A to Z of Bear

2010-11-05T21:58:00.001+08:00

Tagged from Ichimaru~

INSTRUCTIONS: Fill out these questions and make a new note called "ABC About You." Then tag 25 people. If you got tagged by me, you have to take this survey and re-post it! Don’t forget to tag me because I want to know more about you!
A - AVAILABLE: No
B - BIRTHDAY: 23rd of May
C- CRUSHING ON: Alex and a vet student in UPM
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: H2O
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: Dardar
F - FAVORITE SONG AT THE MOMENT: Save You - Simple Plan
H - HOMETOWN: KL
I - IN LOVE WITH: Myself & Salmon
J - JUGGLE: Exams, assignment & reports
K - KILLED SOMEONE: NO
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: KL to Penang
M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: Mango
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 2
O - ONE WISH: Filthy RICH
P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: dardar
R- REASON TO SMILE: Anytime anywhere
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: I Do Not Hook Up - Kelly Clarkson
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 7.30 am
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR: All but not white...
V - VEGETABLE: I am close to vegetarian
W - WORST HABIT: Nose picking
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD MOST RECENTLY: 2 yrs ago for UPM
Y - YOYOS ARE: Cool~
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Gemini

RANDOM QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU
Your favorite number/s: 23
What color do you wear most: Red, Orange, White
Least favorite color: Grey
What are you listening to: Spinning fan...
Are you happy with your life right now: Why not???
What is your favorite class in school: None
Who is/are your best friend/s: Pat and Dardar
Are you outgoing: I am ongoing
Favorite pair of shoes: New balance
Can you dance?: Dardar say can
Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth: Whats's a cherry stem?
Can you whistle: accidentally tried once, on normal days NO
Cross your eyes: HUH???
Walk with your toes curled: Nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN...
Do you believe in life in other planets: yes
Do you believe in miracles: yes
Do you believe in magic: you mean illusions?
Love at first sight: Nope
Do you believe in Santa: hahaha... never =.="
Do you know how to swim: Yes
Do you like roller coasters: Yes
Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows: I will puke
Have you ever been on a plane: yup
Have you ever asked someone out: Yes
Have you ever been to the ocean: Yes
Have you ever painted your nails?: Urgh... so girly

THE WHAT'S
What is the temperature outside?: 31 degree Celsius
What radio station do you listen to: My FM
What was the last restaurant you ate at: Do you count mamak as a restaurant?
What was the last thing you bought: dinner bak kut teh and Tom Yam
What was the last thing on TV you watched: News

THE WHO'S
Who was the last person you IM'd: dardar
Who was the last person you took a picture of: Chicks
Who was the last person you said I love you to: I said I lub you to Dardar

CRYING SECTION
Ever really cried your heart out: My heart is still in
Ever cried yourself to sleep: yup
Ever cried on your friend's shoulder: yup
Ever cried over the opposite sex: My mum?
Do you cry when you get an injury: Duh
Do certain songs make you cry: Yes... Love of Siam theme song

HAPPY SECTION
Are you a happy person?: most of the time

LOOK AT ME
What is your current hair color: Brown

CURRENTLY WEARING
What shirt are you wearing: I am shirtless fondling my nipples
Pants: You guys wear pants at home?
Shoes: None
Necklaces: None

IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite eye color: Hazel
Short or long hair: Army style
Height: No dwarves please!

HAVE YOU EVER
Been to jail: No
Mooned someone: No
Thought about suicide: yeah
Laughed so hard you cried: yes
Cried in school: when I got upset of J
Thrown up in a store: No
Wanted to be a model: YES
Seen a dead body:Yes
Been on drugs: only medications
Gone skinny dipping: T__T never

THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King: McD
Single or Group Dates: Single
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Strawberries or Blueberries: Blueberries
Meat or Veggies: Veggies
TV or Movie: Movie
Guitar or Drums: guitar
Adidas or Nike: Nike sux! Adidas sux too but Nike sux even more...
Chinese or Mexican: Chinese
_____________________________________________________________________
Who did u tag: To whoever interested

Unexpected

2010-11-03T23:11:00.002+08:00

My finals started yesterday. It was okay I guess. After the paper, Pat and I went for a movie at The Mines TGV. Pathetic! The cinema only had 4 movies on that day. Out of the 4 movies, 2 were local production. Since Pat had watched Sammy the Turtle, we opted for The Other Guys. Nice movie. Made me laughed the whole time. Wanna know more? Watch it yourself... Pat and I had a little talk too. Apparently, he didn't expect 'us' to last until now. He thought we would have broke off in half a year time. I asked why and he replied that I am someone that would get bored at something real quick. I guess there are many things that don't always follow our expectations. I also didn't expect the movie to be so funny. hehehe...

Year End Trip

2010-10-29T17:45:00.002+08:00

Dardar and I have been talking about traveling. First choice, Bangkok. I so wanna go meet Witwisit and Mario there. They are so cute! Christmas over there will be so fun. The other options are Bali and Hong Kong. These choices are within my affordability but they will squeeze dry my savings and PTPTN. I think dardar got headache ady cos I keep saying that it's expensive. LOL! Dardar suggested Singapore that have no interest at all. To me, Singapore is just a bigger, cleaner and more eye candy version of Kuala Lumpur. How how how??? I have never been out of Malaysia before.

School Boy or Ah Beng?

2010-10-26T21:00:00.001+08:00

Picture taken at Miko Steamboat Buffet 1 day after the haircut... I think the black singlet is so motivational for me to workout XD

Short Clean Simple

2010-10-25T21:10:00.001+08:00

Just got my haircut last morning. Schoolboy look. I think I look cute now (you guys can throw up). But how I wish to get the haircut like above. Or was I wishing to get a guy like the above XD

German boys... Simply adorable...

Never Forever-Lasting

2010-10-23T10:50:00.005+08:00

Few weeks back there was a radio DJ that commented about how people think about marriage. Last time people would only think that their marriage is an eternal bond that binds the couple until they meet their grave. This may be true for many asians I supposed. He then added on that nowadays when people get married, they think of how long they will last. This really made me think why did the Terengganu government is offering free honeymoon to couples that are on the brink of divorce. There have been numeral reports that divorce rate in Malaysia is on the rise. So, do you feel the hypocrisy when straights point out that homos are discouraged because of their flamboyant nature? Then again, why are there cases of father raping their own daughter or grandchild? The LGBT has always been portrayed negatively. They just don't realize the damage they have brought upon the youngsters.

On the other hand, I really wonder if gay couples could really live a life without penetration. I personally have never experienced anal even after being in 2 relationship. Cuddling, kissing, foreplay, mutual jerk off and some occasional oral is all that is enough for me. Anyone out there same like me?

Spare Me Tyre

2010-10-19T21:45:00.000+08:00

Last week, I had to skip japanese lesson coz the tyre finally gave in. My first experience changing tyre with dardar. I wanted to help but dardar won't let me touch coz he say it's dirty. awww... Very lucky that we had shelter and not under the hot afternoon blaze. I was also lucky enough to get to see the whole process. Definitely less panicky if it ever happens to me.

When two become one

2010-10-18T21:45:00.003+08:00

Have you guys ever seen 2 bananas in 1 peel? I took this picture from the UPM convo bazaar. It's not a production of photoshop. People comes in pairs. Some animals too. We were taught in school that a couple should consist of male and female. But I guess this picture somehow proves that 2 ~~gays~~ bananas can really be together. But then again, I wonder if I might see 3 happily together.

UPM Convo Bazaar

2010-10-15T20:30:00.000+08:00

Both of them shopping together while I was on duty at the stall. I suspect they are one of us. Anyway, Rockmelons are more attractive compared to their cousin, Honeydew. Met a very rude lady that scolded my coursemates. She totally went overboard by saying that they are stupid, useless people standing in front of the stall preventing customers from shopping peacefully. Yeah... she yelled like it was no ones business. I think she could have say it in a nicer way.

Ultraman

2010-10-14T20:33:00.002+08:00

Could this be Ultraman Jino in his human form? Or perhaps he is just Ultraman Dardar =P

Furball

2010-10-13T20:30:00.001+08:00

Nono sleeping like an infant. So cute... hehehe... These days he is quite responsive. He loves sunflower seed a lot. Can easily trick him to stand on both legs using it as bait. He then falls on his back. I know I am so bad right. hehehe... Some of you may already know this. The hamster doesn't belong to me. So fun to play with this furball.

More About Me: Fetish

2010-10-05T21:09:00.001+08:00

I have this habit of picking my nose. I used to think it is gross and should never be done in public. But not so long ago I discover a new fetish of mine. To pick nose regardless it is mine or not! LOL! When dardar go to bed. I disturb him by picking his nose. When he sleeps too much I will also do the same. wakakaka! Next is when I see people picking their nose during a traffic congestion, I will do the same while looking at them until they notice me. Definitely a good tease when I saw this malay lady laughed after seeing me pick my nose coz she was doing the same thing. The final one was EPIC! My classmate wanted to make me cheat in the exam and presented the pinky swear. I pretended I was gonna do it but put my pinky into my nose instead and she felt gross. The whole idea of cheating was never brought up again. LOL!

Shark Tale

2010-10-04T21:30:00.001+08:00

I have never felt more dreaded than this Monday morning. Reluctantly I went for the usual genetics lecture. I swear I could have fall asleep if the room temperature was any colder. I could barely understand anything the prof was talking about. My brains just wanna shutdown and enter sleep mode. The clock striked 12, everyone leapt with joy. By the time i woke up from my induced zombie state, half of the class has already left. About 10 of them were still around as they need to resit some failed paper. Pat and I then walked out of the lecture room and found ourselves in a pretty scary situation.

Some coursemates were chatting with Prof Shark.

Prof Shark: Who is Bear?
silence...
Prof Shark: You know who is ~~Bernard~~ Bear? (asking Pat)
Pat:... (pointing at me)

Shit! What does the shark wanna do with me. Some shit is bound to happen!

Bear: yea, anything?
Prof Shark: So you are Bear. You are the top scorer?

WTF! How the heck did he know. I did not cheat in exam!

Bear: err... is there any problem? (still don't know what is his intention)
Prof Shark: Tak de (no problem). Keep it up.
Bear: okay...

Pat suspects that the coursemates might have leaked some info to him that leads him to me. Gosh! He is one of the lecturers that I would wanna avoid at all cost. He is not named Prof Shark for nothing. Anyway, I got away unscathed. Bound to meet him again during the FYP presentation. I smell trouble!

Crush

2010-10-02T11:31:00.001+08:00

I feel miserable at times. Not because dardar bully me. Not because I have to do reports or assignments or farmwork. Can you imagine how does it feel to bump into this cute guy almost everyday when you are in uni. I don't mean Mario Maurer but a guy that you are attracted to. Someone that exudes a certain aura that makes you feel like you are having a teenage crush. He has those cute puppy eyes that instantly melts your heart. He is so adorable that you wanna look at him as much as you can before he leaves the bus. Yeah... I met him countless times on the bus. Everytime I get to see him, I tense up. I shy away behind the bus seats trying to minimize the chances that he would notice me looking at him. Each time, there will be his 'fans' calling out his name "Alex, Alex, Alex...". Somehow these people always pop out of nowhere yelling his name out loud. I guess he is really popular. He doesn't carry anything most of the time. Perhaps he has his 'fans' to carry them. Sigh... I always remind myself that I already have a bf that cares about me. Someone that will be there for me whenever I need him. But it is really difficult to resist temptations when UPM have many cuties as well as hot hunky guys with perfectly sculpted 6 pack abs running around college area.

Think Not Ting

2010-10-01T12:45:00.004+08:00

Lui Yan striked a conversation with me before Japanese lesson.

Lui Yan: Come on... the next quiz okay?(signalling me to 'help' her out with the next evaluation)
Bear: err... I think you should revise more often. Then, there is no need for my assistance.
Lui Yan: Wah... You think and you don't ting.
Bear: huh?
Lui Yan: You THINK and you don't TING!
Bear: So?
Lui Yan: Normally malaysians pronounce think as ting. But you don't!
Bear: hmm... I thought most people around here wouldn't notice.
Lui Yan: I do!

It somehow surprised me when she pointed out my pronunciation. Honestly, no disrespect to you guys out there but I have encountered many people with great vocab and writing style but when it comes to speaking they really suck. I don't mean pronouncing bombastic words but simple words such as 'dick', 'tree', 'three', 'eight' or 'birthday'. Seldom do people realize that they have been eating many alphabets such as -k at the back or th- in front of a word.

More About Me: Study

2010-09-28T19:20:00.000+08:00

My average score for most test don't fall below 85%. My coursemates assume that I am very hardworking. Just yesterday, my lecturer decided to make me the class role-model. What they don't realize is that I am just as lazy as them. I play Atlantica Online during my free hours. I watch TV at dardar's house. I read Facebook most of the time. I spend time talking to dardar about many things. I am just an average Joe enjoying life in a way I think is enjoyable.

So, how/when do I study?

1) I do last minute revision. I think alot people do the same. Dardar can be my eye witness. I am LAZY.
2) I know my limit/ability. I estimate the minimum amount of time I need to revise the subject to maintain the pointer. I normally take 1 night or 2 to cover 1 subject.
3) If you know the subject have alot of memorizing to do, write short simple notes. I only do this when the handouts are too long and filled with repitition or infos that I think is useless in exams.
4) Always attend lectures. Pay attention to the tips/hints given by the lecturer. They may say things like "Students normally can't answer when I ask them...", "This is very important", "I may include this in the test".
5) Know the format/ style of the lecturer. If they say they will ask essay type questions, focus more on topics that have comparisons, processes as well as factors that are 5 and more. I would normally avoid definitions if is essay type. If is objective questions I would just read the notes many times and try to memorize those with 3 or 4 factors.
6) Borrow reference books when you don't understand. Most of the time I only read lecture notes but there are times when I borrow books to get a better understanding on certain topics. This is normally becoz the handouts given don't have good explanations.
7) Study/ practice everyday if you are learning a new language. I am taking Japanese and I study whenever I am not around dardar. In between classes or during lunch break. Then around dardar, I try to speak Japanese with whatever vocab I can recall.
8) Open your mouth! Ask questions when you don't understand. By doing so, you not only get your answers but the lecturer also knows that you are interested in his lecture. They get to know you and remembers your name. They might even get friendly and provide you with their handphone number. This will go a long way if you are expected to be in his/her class for several semesters.
9) Don't be shy, ask for exam tips and guides from lecturers. They MAY or MAY NOT give but at least I will know if he/she does.

Lastly, study style differs for everyone. The way I study is applicable because I am just taking Bachelor of Aquaculture. Not medicine, pharmacy or engineering.

Weekend Unlike Other

2010-09-27T09:05:00.001+08:00

I went back home last weekend. Words to describe it would be bored, eat-all-you-can, workout. Bored coz there is no TV and internet at home. Eat-all-you-can is when my mum cooks lunch with ABC soup, barley wintermelon and jelly. Mum also asked me to eat mooncakes, grapes and plums. Our fridge also have ice-cream, yakults and chocolate. Ever since my sister has been away to uni, the fridge has more food ^__^

Then there is workout, one of the only time that I will workout is when I am totally disconnected from internet. Oppsss... Not forgetting to mention the lots of 'candies' in the morning Kepong market as well as the lengzai living just across the street. Do you know how satisfying it is to wake up on a Sunday morning greeted by a lengzai neighbour that is washing his car topless! The greeting part never happened...

Don't Bitch With Me

2010-09-22T20:05:00.001+08:00

It's Mid Autumn Festival. I don't know is it becoz I am so used to being with dardar. I miss him. It's not even a day since we parted. Procrastinating my work again. I just don't feel like being the top of the pack any longer. The fire no longer exist. I used to be very competitive. But nowadays receiving the marks I just smile and keep the paper in my bag. Not that I am doing bad in my exams nor am I giving any excuses. Uni life is getting boring. Except for the occasional eye candies. Coursemates are nothing but coursemates. We would not get along. Why? They are all bitch. Just pisses me off from time to time. And I am not playing mr nice guy any more. They always take advantage of Pat. I despise them. Yeah... I am quite protective of my friends.

Are You Gay?

2010-09-21T18:30:00.001+08:00

I was in class chatting away with Pat as usual. The lecturer teaching genetics arrived in the class and after sometime before the lesson starts, she striked a conversation.

Lect: You wear only 1 earring. You gay ke?
Bear: (stunned... after 2 months only she noticed) err...
Lect: You know, a guy that likes guys.
Bear: ...
Lect: If not then you think it's fashionable?
Bear: Yeah, cantik ma... (means it's beatiful)
Lect: Oh, lelaki pun mau cantik... (means guys also wanna look attractive)

I guess there are people that thinks you are gay as long as you have an earring regardless of which side. Right side is no longer the gay ear. As long as you have a single ear piercing you are auto-labelled as GAY! LMAO!

Christmas Comes Early

2010-09-18T08:30:00.001+08:00

That night the moon was bright. The fireflies decorated the area surrounding us. As if the place was filled with Christmas trees. Both of us sitting side by side. Our pinky crossing each other. Just romantic.

Spotting a Lala Look

2010-09-17T07:40:00.002+08:00

Went shopping with dardar...

price tag still on... LOL... I am not for sale though =P

I Like to Act Cute

2010-09-15T14:45:00.001+08:00

This morning, when I woke up, I had the urge to write this post. It's true to the title. I like to act cute. Why? Sometimes it comes naturally. When my imagination runs wild, I can do actions that catches people's attention. I don't mind the attention. Whether they think I am cute, crazy or dumb. I DON'T care. Sometimes I act cute or silly to make dardar happy. And sometimes I do it to make my friends laugh. I want people around me to be happy. Why the serious face all the time? I just don't get it. Anyhow, I was kinda surprised when I read what Jerry a.k.a Beyond wrote. Seriously, awesome timing!

I make face. I make anime voices. I dance. I pose. Most importantly, I smile!

Shangri-La Hotel Lunch Buffet @ Wedding

2010-09-14T09:59:00.000+08:00

My coursemate think I look like korean. WTF!

Wedding lunch buffet of my cousin sister was held at the Shangri-la hotel in Kuala Lumpur. Food was amazing. They have many corners to choose from. Whether indian, chinese, japanese or western. They also have dimsum, pastries, cakes(tiramisu, strawberry cheese, chocolate, etc.), crepe, brownies, mousse, chocolate fountain with our choice of marshmellow and fruits. They also have an assortment of cheese! Be it brie, gorgonzola, gouda and many that I have never heard of. Choice of soup includes the sharkfin soup and seafood soup(chunks of shrimps, scallops and fish). Their smoked items were really good, I tried the salmon, duck and some other fish. The most awesome part was their prawns! They totally own it! The prawns were XXL size! If you guys go Yuen Steamboat buffet, just imagine the prawn to be at least 3 times the size of it. Grilled mutton was really good too... Too bad I had no pictures to show. Left my handphone at dardar's home. But did managed to camwhore with sis. Heard from my mum the buffet was RM120 per pax.

When we arrived at the hotel, I was not amazed by the interior design. Why? My eye was busy kapzai. LOL! There was this tanned chinese guy that caught my attention from the minute I walked into the lobby. I was thinking, "Shit! hopefully he goes to the same wedding buffet as we are..." Seconds later, mum was talking to his mother! She then asked me to go over and greet the old lady. Then mum said "This is your kindergarten classmate". I was like WTF! Where have you been to all this years?!!! Throughout the whole day I kept stealing glances at him whenever I went to take food. I am not all too sad either. I saw him looking at me too most of the time when I try to look at him. If you wonder how he looks like, see the picture just above. That's not him, just someone that resembles alot like him.

I think my aunt is really modern. She doesn't follow the old traditions for a chinese wedding. Simple and satisfying.

~dardar say the blue shirt looks nice~

Random Joke

2010-09-12T08:30:00.000+08:00

What is happiness without piness(penis)? Just hap, you won't be happy...

Out of Closet to Aunt Jennifer

2010-09-11T09:40:00.002+08:00

Last night there was this family gathering where most of my aunts gathered. As usual, all the greetings went on. Aunt Jennifer came up to me and gave me a thorough check. She was looking from head to toe. LOL. She noticed that I had an ear piercing. So observant of her. She then pulled me aside for interrogation.

A Jennifer: That is on the right ear!

Bear: Ugh... yeah...

A Jennifer: You didn't know it is the gay ear?

Bear: err... I know ah...

A Jennifer: OMG... means you are?

Bear: erm... erm... yea~

A Jennifer: Woah! (she was very surprised and excited at the same time) Are you lying?

Bear: No~

A Jennifer: Your mum know?

Bear: Kinda know lor... I told her before but she told me to stop thinking about it and concentrate on study.

A Jennifer: yeah... ur mum can't accept it.

Bear: yea I know.

A Jennifer: OMG... Is this for real... OK... I am very excited bcoz I have 2 best friends that are also one of you... You got a bf?

Bear: err... yeah... almost 1 year ady...

A Jennifer: hmm... okay... I respect ur decision. I like you more and more from every meet up. But should be careful not to let ur BITCHY aunt know. (another of my aunt)

Bear: I thought no one here would notice.

A Jennifer: Just be careful. She knows alot of people and she knows many stuff. If she knows, she will be sure to spread it to everyone saying how ur mum don't know how to teach her son.

Bear: Err... okay...

A Jennifer: We can be friends now... hehehe... Add me on FB. May be we can meet up with my besties. They study in UCSI and UTAR.

Bear: ok gua...

Muhhh!Nay!

2010-09-09T09:45:00.005+08:00

PTPTN do have some efficiency although they are cumbersome to deal with. Within 2 weeks I got my first sum of money. After deducting the uni fees I have 2k left to spend. Mostly on food I suppose. But I really ought to spend more wisely. I have been gaining weight ever since being with Dardar >.<" Ever since we started, our frequency of buffet tolled at once a month! Never in my life have I eaten so many buffet so consistently. Dardar even said 2k is alot to spend if it's just on food. I don't think so though. 2k for half a year I would still need to work part time to fill up the money I spend for the holidays.The money does help, but it is not enough.

KTM Candy

2010-09-08T09:01:00.000+08:00

This is another guy that I bump into during the KTM ride from Serdang to MV. Gosh... he is so looking at me... Somehow the guy either notice that I am trying to take his pic or he is into me. LOL! But he looks better in person than in the picture... kehehehe...

Bosco, Fussy Food Choice

2010-09-06T08:25:00.000+08:00

Bosco DOESN'T like colour enhancing pellets that I gave him. He was ok with them in the beginning. But when I changed him to a larger tank he somehow no longer wants to eat the pellets I gave. He would nibble nibble the floating pellet then leave it alone. Worse is he would swallow it and then vomit it out. Zzz... The thing is, I don't understand why Bosco doesn't eat the pellets coz my friend Patrick also bought one Betta and the same feed but his fish is eating. I was a little worried cos I bought the pellet for RM8! dammit! so waste lor... plus it was a very small 35g bottle only. At the same time I also bought some artificial powdered feed for one of my projects in uni. My team managed to breed some Molly fish and require some tiny feed in powdered form. So I tried feeding the same powdered feed to Bosco and luckily he likes them. I also bought some frozen bloodworms but have yet to feed him those. The frozen bloodworm only cost RM2! Really cheap and recommended.

~Animals living under pikey's roof are picky eaters~

Bosco, My Siamese Fighting Fish

2010-09-03T09:40:00.003+08:00

The past week, I had a field trip to Aquatic International. After scouting for the aquatic plants that was need for the experiment, everyone went berserk looking for the fish that they wanna buy. It has been sometime since I last have a pet of my own. But being in college and going to salmon's place and going back home doesn't make keeping a pet any easier. But salmon has an interest in keeping fish. Just that he doesn't know how. LOL. So I thought a Betta would fit perfectly. They are air breathers. No need aeration. Nice to look at. Initially I wanted to get a halfmoon breed but it costs RM7! For the price I opted the longtail breed which is ony RM1 after discount. Dardar asked me what is his name. It never came to my mind to give him a name but I just blurted Bosco. kyahaha! I think it's a cute name. Same like Nicky gor's favourite Hong Kong artist =P

~Don't release alien species into the local environment~

Kuala Terengganu: Turtle Extinction Plan

2010-08-28T00:16:00.000+08:00

Several nights were spent in Kuala Terengganu after Redang and before heading back for KL. The host was kind enough to show us around the town. He brought us to the quite famous Crystal Mosque. Then we had a beach walk at night near the KT hospital. Other places are not worth mentioning. But we did savour the local delicacies they had to offer such as nasi dagang, mi sup and keropok lekor. The host even prepared BBQ on one of the nights. He practically invited the whole kampung. I was stunned seeing the amount of people pouring into his double-storey house. That night we watched the world cup while munching on the satay, hot-dogs and fried noodle.

While the host was busy with his work, he dropped us at the town. We manage to get our asses to several locations such as the chinese street, Masjid Raja Putih and the market. We took our time doing some souvenir shopping at the market place. I was actually fascinated by the varieties of never-before-seen stuff such as turtle eggs! My first time seeing one. I am not happy about it though. Talk about wildlife conservation and protection. The locals at Terengganu told me that there are not much turtles that return to lay eggs anymore. The reason is clear... they harvest the eggs and sell them. The Malay girls that traveled with me actually thought of buying them. I was like WTF! As for shopping there, I advise that any non-malays should have malay friends traveling with them to get good discounts. I would have enjoyed the trip more if it was not for the sunburn. Skin was peeling off from all over my face to my shoulder! Ouch!

~Conservation efforts in Malaysia sucks to the core~

PTPTN = Bitch?

2010-08-23T13:05:00.001+08:00

It's a bitch coz it is sooo freakin troublesome. From filling in online application and printing them out to photocopy all necessary documents. Then I would need to get it back home for mum to sign. Then find my academic advisor to sign the stuff. RM20 stamps from the post office and past semester results. Then comes the letter from BHEP to confirm that I am still a student or UPM. Back and forth I go. A lot of the time was actually spent on walking and taking bus. Although, I did meet several cute guys in the whole process. hehehe... one of them is Alex. I wish I could snap a picture of him. He has those puppy eyes that is oh sooo cute >.<

Oppsss... :p

~Bear hates troublesome stuff~

Pulau Redang: Malaysian Paradise

2010-08-20T00:30:00.001+08:00

I spent the night before in a not so traditional Malay kampung. The host were really generous, we had a taste of the few durian kampung before we head out. Heavenly! To top that off, the malay siblings are really cute! I like it when guys are topless walking around the house. kekeke...

The sky was clear on the day we departed for one of the most beautiful island beach that Malaysia had to offer. Her name was Redang.The boat ride was one to remember. I sat at the head of the boat. I feel the ocean breeze. The late morning ray beaming on my skin. Nature at its best. Sitting right there on the front most made me feel as if I am the captain of the boat. Just like Luffy in One Piece.

Approximately 45 minutes later, we arrived at the beach with crystal clear water. I really couldn't believe my eyes at that moment. It was just breathtaking. For my entire life I have only seen such scenery in documentations or pictures. The waters were clear blue-green with the sand on the beach seemed bleached to white perfection. It was no 5 star accommodation. Only small little chalets with a tinge of melayu-ness. It was quiet. No hunky beach boys. No speedo-man sun tanning on the beach. No annoying kids releasing their load of youth on the beach. Just peaceful, serene and almost deserted. Good for those that wants a break from the constant noise pollution that the city offers.

Days here was spent snorkeling and sleeping. I love to sleep on those comfy bed. This was also my first time snorkeling. I do know how to swim but the sight of the really deep sea actually did sent chills down me spines. I was hoping to see some sharks but at the same time I don't wanna be in the water with them. LOL! I don't wanna lose any part of my body =.="

Having that said, I still entered the water. Lots of beautiful fish. All attracted by the bread crumbs that divers threw into the water. When there was no more bread, the fish started nibbling on my feet and arms. I became fish food! The ocean floor was filled with tons of sea cucumber and corals. But the corals are sad to say DEAD. Spot no sea turtle. No a sight of any sharks. Sigh. Kinda disappointed.

Snorkeling on its own is really different from swimming. A lot more easier I would say. 1 thing though, I don't understand why people only swim 10 metres around the boat for 2 freakin hours. What is there to see in that same spot?!

~Where are the sea turtles?~

Bear Speaks Japanese

2010-08-07T11:05:00.002+08:00

Bear was really excited when the deputy dean told bear that he was allowed to take japanese for his elective subjects. There were many misunderstanding that happened between the ex-deputy dean and the students from bear's course. The ex-deputy dean informed us that we may only take subjects that are printed on the guideline even for our free electives. That was a total bullshit! In the guideline was written a couple 'suggestions' quoted by the current deputy dean that includes only Mandarin, Arab or advance english courses. For chinese students aren't allowed to take Mandarin, they can only choose between the english or arab. Doesn't make sense right? It was written as free electives and why is it that we must only pick from that few options. Bear was really pissed when he found out about the falsely given info from the deputy dean coz during orientation week we were told that we may choose any subject of our liking as long as we fulfill the 6 credit hours requirements.

Putting that aside, bear am now proudly 3 weeks old in japanese study. Memorizing Hiragana was a pain in the butt. Now bear have to memorize Katakana that have the same sounds but different writings! It's agonizing to have to study a new language and at the same time having 4 labs a week with 2 projects going on. Anyhow, the japanese lecturers were really helpful. Bear wished that he could be under Farah sensei though. She gives more exercises for writing purposes. Eriko sensei that bear is currently under is a busy women. But she's from Japan! Cool huh! Good thing about her is she also teaches us about japanese culture. She is quite a cartoon character. Why? She always wear her clothes in sets of colours. Meaning, she wears either all red or all green from glasses to shoes and even her earrings! Any how, next week is test 1, have to add oil!

~ がんばってください ~

The Footprints of Brave Bear: 1 year old

2010-08-05T10:42:00.001+08:00

It has been a year since I have started blogging here in blogspot. Things have changed alot then when I first started blogging. I caught myself a salmon through this blog. Met plenty of other bloggers that are all unique in their very own way. Even had an encounter with a reader non-blogger that turn out as an 'experiment'. I first started blogging with support from several friends of mine which I am unsure if they are still following my blog or not. But I still have to thank JY, WH and LL for their encouragements and comments. To all readers, followers, and supporters thank you too for being here, regardless you are a silent follower or loud ones that likes to comment.

As for my lack of updates, there has been many things happening in my life that I find myself too tired to update the blog. You may call me lazy or whatever but I will still find the time to keep this blog alive, so bare with me awhile. Several posts are delayed for now due to many photos still not in my hands yet. Again, I sincerely thank you for joining me in my walk of life. As a token of appreciation~

P.S: This post was set to be posted on July 31 but somehow it didn't show up. Blogspot is to blame...

~ ありがとう ~

My Fault, Your Fault, Our Fault

2010-07-28T22:45:00.001+08:00

Last night bear was searching for Atlantica. He asked for some assistance from a salmon to help persuade a witch to join bear's party. Salmon gladly lent a hand. He did all that he could to ensure that the bear gets to meet the witch. But salmon did not realize that the witch only likes stronger and more powerful bear. He brought the witch to meet bear. For bear already has a full group of members he had to choose to eliminate one of his allies. The master scouter was voted off. The witch then told bear that she does not like inexperienced master. With that, bear lost his scouter that he persuaded with gold to join and time to train the formation. Bear was unhappy with salmon. He blamed salmon for his lack of knowledge. Moments later bear realize that it was not entirely salmon's fault. Bear himself was too excited to hear the demands of the witch earlier. Salmon apologized but bear just wanted to be left alone.

I guess most humans tend to find fault in others first before reflecting on their own actions. I too am human. I too have blamed others for my misfortunes. That very night, I knew salmon was going to bed. At that moment, I have already realize that it was partly my fault. I wanted to kiss goodnight with salmon and say sorry. But I hessitated. Part of me was still too fired up with the incident. Salmon noticed that I was still awake at 2am. He came to check on me. After a heart to heart to talk, we went to bed with me still feeling useless for not being able to utter those words, "I am sorry".

~Sorry can sometimes be the hardest words to say~

Atlantica Online: The Dawn of a New Hero

2010-07-21T22:30:00.002+08:00

Last night bear was playing MapleStory as usual hunting for the golden eggs dropped by golden pigs. Mind you, bear finished up his reports before playing the online game yea... It suddenly struck bear that both bear and salmon has been playing their own online game separately for 6 months plus. Bear have always wanted to play an online game with a partner. Someone that bear could always travel and complete missions with. It seems more fun that way. In the beginning bear thought of luring salmon into playing MapleStory but it didn't work. Bear wanted to try out too the game that got salmon so addicted. Hence he ask salmon to create a new account for em'. From there onwards, starts a new adventure for Bear.

~Virtual or reality, what matters is enjoying the moments together~

HIV in Malaysia

2010-07-18T22:30:00.002+08:00

Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) as we all know is something that no human would ever wish to be infected with. Few days ago I was reading The Star newspaper in the library when an article about AIDS stuff suddenly appear on the bottom of the page. It was reported that most of the new cases were drug abusers which makes up 57%. This is then followed up by 30 percent from heterosexual relationships. It also reported that women infected with AIDS is on the rise from 9.5% in 2000 to 20% in 2008. Muslims on their own contributing 70% of the reports. After that I did some online search only to end up having no information or what-so-ever about the percentage contributed by the LGBT in Malaysia. But some sources have reported that the main cause of the spread recently is due the the lack of knowledge and education. This reflects on how "effective" our education system here in Malaysia. About half a year ago, I was stunned when I watched some gay themed movies seeing some people holding banners and cardboard saying that HIV/AIDS is GOD's punishment on the LGBTs. Now I can only laugh at it coz it's funny when the punishment is now dealt upon heterosexuals. LOL! I have nothing against 'straight' people here. Just sharing some info here.

~Careful where you insert that dicky~

The Paradise Is Cumin'

2010-06-27T07:27:00.000+08:00

2 more days at Sony and my days there will be over. I like working there coz the colleagues are a bunch of nutcase. They can joke and have fun but when it comes to work they are hell serious. They can make me laugh everyday. I won't miss the occasional free food that I am allowed to tapau, nothing really great just some kuih and sandwiches.

Given my days there, I learned that consumers nowadays are bunch of troublesome & weird people. First, they send in the items for repair and when we informed them the repair cost, they would say it's expensive. FINE... then we ask them whether they want to collect their items back or not, they say want. OK lor... Then after 2 damn friggin' years they left the item there we have to call them again to ask them again whether they wanna collect the item or not, they say want. Hell yeah... After 1 month from the last call we call again since it was not collected, and they will say "Oh~ OMG... My camera is still with you! I totally forgot! I REALLY wanna take it back. I will come to collect it later this evening".

The day after, we check the system and again the item is left uncollected and we called again just to get the answer that he/she doesn't want the thing already and we may dispose it. Isn't it like WTF! If u don't want your shitty items back just say it in the beginning la! I encountered such customer, making us call them again and again and AGAIN! Their standard answers are always like, I will call you to confirm later or I will collect it blablabla... But then again, there are those that really appreciate our work coz I actually received a compliment letter from one of the customer. I was surprised that he/she even took the time to write and send that to us. Anyhow, I will be leaving for Redang on the cumin' Wednesday. Woohoo~

~Don't buy any sony camera, LCD TV or laptop~

Destress The Stressful

2010-06-12T07:25:00.001+08:00

I have actually started my part time work back in early May. I like going to work be it on Monday or Friday. The thing is, there are a handful of cute guys that I meet almost daily either on the LRT, KTM or shuttle bus. Motivates me to go to work somehow. LOL! I did mention about a beefy pilot in the KTM few weeks ago in Facebook. GAWD! He has so much meat I swear I felt like wanna have a BBQ right at that moment! Anyhow, just managed to capture a blur pic of him. Haiz... My K660i is damn lousy.

As for my work... Currently working as a call center agent in Sony. Early on was really stressful. Crazy consumers we have nowadays. Demands for many things. Somehow... Just somehow there seems to me that there are many Petaling Jaya clients that are just too ill mannered. Especially those above 30 years old. They just can't seem to communicate politely. Their answers are almost always short, with a slight taste of dissatisfaction. They also tend to speak in a way as if they are in a hurry with replies such as "yes", "Yea", "So?". Asking for their details and particulars is just a pain in the ass coz most of them are just simply inconsiderate. For example when I ask for their name they would just say out their full name ASAP. Then when I ask for them to spell it, they will spell it quickly all in one go with a grumpy tone and don't even care if u catch the correct spelling. Just compare hearing these name on the phone: Lau Eng Sing, Low Ing Seng, Law Eng Xing (just imagine they expect u to know which spelling). Asking them to repeat the spelling is worse! A lot grumpier as if in that few seconds time spent on repeating could have gotten them the World Cup. They also have a tendency to get into a foul mood and just hammer away at how lousy Sony items and service. Many of them can also speak very LOUDLY, so loud as if they were shouting on the phone. Honestly, if you have come across some Africans you would most likely understand how these PJ people speak on the phone. No difference! Civilized? Then again, this is only true for the plentiful of PJ people that I have spoke through the phone.

p/s: The names mentioned in this post is purely made up.

~I can only laugh behind the phone of your grumpiness~

Xenri Japanese Buffet

2010-05-28T11:00:00.001+08:00

It was 23rd of May (means my birthday... understand~lah) when dardar and I left the house for KL. It was one of the other surprise that dardar secretly planned. This one was well kept, but I did guess what it was gonna be. This was an easy guess coz we have been talking about it ever since we were together. LOL! I have a pretty good nose for whatever my dardar plans to do. hehehe... Anyway, we headed for Menara Hap Seng. The place was awfully quiet. Not much people around. Lucky day for us I guess, we were served with some man-beef to fill our eyes first. A gwai lou though, I am sure many of my blog readers won't really know how to appreciate it. Hahaha!

Xenri only opens at 11.30 for the Japanese lunch buffet! As we entered, we were greeted by all the staff there. Everyone was gleaming with a smile. I was partially shocked with the interior design. Quite nice I would say. We savoured almost everything they had to offer. Well, all except for those cheap fruits & sushi. My 1st time trying raw oysters and it was disastrous. I almost puke the 1st time it went in. Urgh... Maybe it's not yet the time for me to enjoy such delicacy. As for what I have eaten I will leave it to the pictures to do the talk. The food is good, but may not really be all that good for the body.

Too many pictures... Maybe I will post them in facebook-lah~

~Not everyone is suited for huge amount of raw intake~